I was President of NASA

I have to write about something that occasionally creeps up from the depths of my brain and annoys the hell out of me. Everytime I think about this I get angry. It is one hour I wish I could go back and redo. It's going to be a bit long-winded, but I just want to get it off my chest and hopefully expel some of the anger I carry around about this.

In 1996-1997, I was in my fifth and final year at Ball State University. The previous year, I had attended a few meetings for the Native American Student Association. They were a very small group. After attending only a few meetings, they elected me as president for the following year. I was surprised and excited that I would be leading this group, even if it were a small one. We were one of four groups in the House of Multicultural Affairs. The other three were the Asian American group, Black Student Association, and Latino student group. They all had fairly high membership numbers, especially BSA.

Being president was a lot of work. Besides leading the meetings, I had to coordinate events, print flyers and post them, make phone calls, attend Ball State functions, and I even gave presentations to a couple of classes. I had help of course... from our secretary, treasurer, and vice president. The names of the active members were Tom, Beth, Scott, and Steve. The five of us were sometimes the only ones who showed up for meetings.

We worked very hard not only to set up events but to also reach out to American Indian students on campus and encourage them to get involved. We sent them notices of our meetings, and we advertised our major events to them. Still, no one came to our meetings.

We had Mary Brave Bird, author of Lakota Woman, come and speak (her book made me cry; her name on the book is actually Mary Crow Dog). We also had a clothes and food drive for the Lakota of Pine Ridge, South Dakota, who are among the poorest of people living on reservations. Our biggest event was a powwow, held in the spring. I was working two jobs and attending full time classes. When I look back, I don't know how I did it all.

When the end of the year rolled around, there was some discussion in the House of Multicultural Affairs about whether our group should call it quits for the following year or keep going. None of our members wanted the group to quit, except one as it turns out.

Just a few days before graduation, we had a guest speaker, and afterwards we gathered in the student center to take a vote on whether or not to keep going. This is where I'd like to start my "do over". There were many people there, including the HMA personnel, the founder of the Native American Student Association (which was originally called Students of Native American Cultures but we renamed it because too many people thought it was a group of people interested in the culture rather than actual American Indian students), and even our guest speaker hung around for the meeting.

A girl was there who had attended one or two of our meetings during the year. She was African American and claimed to have some Indian heritage. I never doubted people because you really can't tell by looking at someone. I cannot remember her name (I think I blocked it from memory). Before our vote there was some discussion. I had observed in the past that this girl had a particularly nasty temperament, and she demonstrated it here. She was really down on our group and the main thing I remember her saying was "Well, I just didn't see any Native American leadership in this group." To top it off, the vice-president of our group was sitting right next to her and said "I just didn't feel like my voice was heard." I could not believe he said that because I would always ask him... "Scott, what do you think?" and he would usually respond with "I don't care". He rarely spoke up, and I wanted to make sure he had the chance because he was one of the few "legitimate" students in the group (he is part of the Delaware Indians, and I still see him around once in awhile, though I have not talked to him. He even had a display in the Eiteljorg museum).

I was quite emotional that day for many reasons. I didn't want the group to quit, I didn't like being criticized when we had worked so hard, I was about to graduate and move to Indy with no job, and I was going through major relationship changes. So, I cried. In front of all those people I sat there and cried and didn't yell what I wanted to yell at those two. At the time, the American Indian heritage in my family was mostly based on speculation. In the meeting I muttered something about how I didn't really know if I was Indian or not. Oh, how I wish I could take that back! Now I know it's in my blood for sure (see previous post)!

I said "Let's just vote", and unfortunately the vote was to disband the group. I was not the only one who cried... Beth did too. All of the hard-working people in the group were upset. I hugged Steve, and some Indian woman whom I didn't know hugged me. She was very nice and said "I didn't know you weren't Indian.", and I said "That's just it... I don't know." That was comment number two I want to take back. I left the student center in tears and somewhat humiliated, and the whole event has bothered me since.

If I could go back, I would say to the girl "First of all, you only came to two meetings, so your opinion about this group's leadership is meaningless. Also, we tried to reach out to students through the year. They did not respond, but we tried. So I didn't grow up on a reservation, and my family may not practice any of the culture, but I have Cherokee ancestry. I was elected by the group, and I did my best. I didn't see YOU trying." And to Scott, I would say "I asked you if you had any input or opinion on things and most of the time you didn't. How can you say your voice was not heard? If you really wanted to say something, you should have spoken up."

I recently contacted the House of Multicultural Affairs out of curiosity, to see if they had reestablished a group. They have not done so yet, but the current organizer said they are looking into it.

Well, it was certainly a learning experience. I lost touch with all of the group members after that day. I wish I could talk to them again. It really sucked to end that way after working together all year.

Thankful It's Over

Thanksgiving was a lot of fun, but I'm glad the driving is over. We travelled over four hours... first to see my mom and step-dad and that side of the family and second to see my dad and step-mom and her three daughters (two of whom I had never met). We spent 3 hours in each location. Tomorrow I will cook turkey and all the trimmings for James's side of our family. It was great to see everyone... and Christmas is just around the corner, so we'll see most of them again soon!

Harry Potter!!

I took a half day off of work on Friday to go see Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire with my friends. It was awesome! They really condensed the book down, but they did a great job of it. It is a huge book and I wondered where they would cut corners. Goblet had everything you could want in a movie... drama, humor, action, and even romance. It is now my favorite HP movie so far, followed by Prisoner of Azkaban, Sorcerer's Stone, and Chamber of Secrets. Chamber is still excellent, but it's my least favorite. I am still trying to figure out why Harry heard the basilisk speaking Parseltongue from inside the water pipes all year, yet when he met him face to serpenty face, the basilisk didn't say a single thing.

I am playing the Goblet of Fire video game... can't get enough Harry Potter.

November Already?

Halloween came and went in a flash. Tess was the cutest witch! Now Thanksgiving is just around the corner, and it's going to be a busy one. It all starts on Wednesday, when I will be preparing dishes to take with me the following day. On Thanksgiving day we will travel down towards Bloomington to my mom's (a 1 hour, 20 minute drive), where we will eat Thanksgiving lunch (and a lot of dessert). At 3pm, we will depart mom's and head to Rushville (a 2 hour drive) to see my dad. His wife's three daughters will be there, and I have never met two of them. We will have Thanksgiving dinner there (and more dessert). Then we will head back home to Indianapolis (1 more hour in the car) that night. But it doesn't end there...

The next day, I will get up at 6am to dress yet another turkey and put it in the oven. James's parents, two siblings and their kids, and grandma are coming over for Thanksgiving at our house. Let's see, that's a total of 14 people. I will make potatoes and gravy, oyster dressing, cranberry sauce, rolls, pumpkin pie, and probably some deviled eggs. Good thing I like to cook.

Ah, the holidays... so relaxing...

Baby Talk

Tess is 9 months old today. She's been out of the womb for as long as she was in. She's getting such a personality now... perhaps a bit of an attitude. She's adding more sounds to her vocabulary. She's crawling and pulling herself up. It's amazing how fast babies develop. I never knew that babies laughed so much. Tess laughs hysterically at the puppets in her Baby Einstein videos and at her daddy's antics. When she's happy, she says "da da da", but when she's mad, she says "ma ma ma". What a daddy's girl.

A Piece of My Ancestry Confirmed

One of my aunts (on my mother's side) recently took a trip to the Smokey Mountains and visited Cherokee, North Carolina. She did some research and found out what my family has long suspected: We are indeed part Cherokee... Western Cherokee to be specific. My aunt found the names of both Indian women in our family. I think she must have been looking at census records. Very cool!

Sammy Terry

I met local TV legend Sammy Terry for the second time in my life tonight. At Conner Prairie (a living history museum) they have a Halloween event each year called The Headless Horseman. Sammy was there telling scary stories. There were so many people (mostly kids) that you could barely hear him. There was no way we were getting on the hayride to see the headless

horseman either. Kids were all over the place. It was like Chuck E Cheese in the woods.

Somewhere around 20 years ago I met Sammy Terry when he came to the Rushville movie theatre. He introduced a cheesy vampire movie, and after it was over, he signed autographs. I still have the poster that he signed. My mom said she also watched him when she was a kid, so he must be getting up there in age. This time I got a picture, although it was with my cell phone. His trademark laugh is still cool.

The Greatest Inventions In My Lifetime

Ok, they may not be the greatest, but they have certainly improved my life...

1. Pay at the pump gasoline. No more waiting behind some guy with a mullet buying cigarettes and lottery tickets. In fact, you don't even have to go in! Pay at the pump has added hours to my life.

2. Remote control television. I remember sitting directly in front of the television and turning the knob between our five stations... that was channel hopping. I don't watch much television, but when I do, it's really nice to flip channels or activate the Xbox or DVD player from the couch.

3. The microwave. Ah... who could ever forget boiling water on the stove, reheating leftovers in the oven, and making popcorn in those little foil skillets? Those were the good old days. Actually, I hate microwave popcorn, but I have to admit that the microwave does make cooking easier.

4. The Internet (and wireless access). Not only does my career revolve around it, but it's a big part of my personal life. I stay in touch with friends through the Internet, and I can keep James informed on the baby's activities throughout the day. Wireless lets me work right where the baby is playing.

5. Debit cards. I remember my parents writing checks for EVERYTHING. Now, when someone is writing a check at the grocery store, you can see everyone behind them rolling their eyes and sighing. The debit card is so much faster!

6. Cell phones. Of course, I cannot leave this one off the list. My dad came to pick me up from the airport once at about 1:00 AM in the dead of winter. The car decided to break down on the way home. We were stuck on the side of a deserted highway in the snow. A cell phone would have been real handy right about then. Luckily, a tow truck eventually passed by and stopped to see if we needed help. Another time, I had a tire blow out on I-69. I had to walk at least a mile in the dark, which included hobbling down a steep downgrade by an on-ramp, to get to a pay phone. I was alone, and I had two different creepy people stop to see if I needed help. Again, a cell phone would have been nice. Never leave home without it!

Superbugs and Trash

We live in a disposable society. Everything is thrown away, only to end up rotting ever so slowly in a landfill somewhere. I've often wondered where those landfills are and how close people are allowed to live. Surely the smell is overwhelming. I've never seen a landfill in person. I have no idea where my trash goes once it's picked up by the trash truck. Given the amount of trash generated by Americans, one would think the landfills would be reaching our own backyards at this point.

I have seen several products lately that make me wonder "Why?" because they are just adding to the problem. One of them is a plastic crock pot liner. You cook your food in a plastic bag lining the crock pot, and when you're done, you throw the liner away. What a waste! It's not that hard to wash the crock pot when you're done. Plus, just think of all the plastic chemicals that could be seeping into your food while it simmers all day long. Bon Appetit!

Another wasteful product is the toilet wand that has a throw away scrubber. After you scrub the toilet, you release the scrubber and flush it down the toilet. Yet another piece of unnecessary garbage. The basis for this wonder product is germs. The advertisers try to scare us into buying products like this with the threat of germs, but little do people realize that there are probably fewer germs on the toilet brush than on their tooth brush. This brings me to my next topic.

Not only are we creating mountains of trash every day, we are also creating superbugs. Every cleaning product is anti-bacterial now. You can't even find liquid hand soap that is NOT anti-bacterial. We are killing the good bacteria while trying so hard to get rid of the bad bacteria. The result is that the bacteria are evolving into superbugs: bugs that have developed a resistance to antibiotics. This problem, like the disposable products, can be traced back to companies trying to make a profit. "You must get rid of those bacteria, now here is the product to do so!" There is one commercial in particular where a woman is washing down her kitchen with a raw chicken breast. "If you're not using x product, you might as well be doing this", the commercial says. I never had salmonella growing up, and my mom didn't have these products. Good old soap and water works just fine. I try not to be sucked in to these gimmicks, but some of them do make life easier. Now excuse me while I go Swiffer the floor.

You Say It's Your Birthday

I'm 32 today. I'd like to stay at this age and not grow any older. It's been an exciting year with the new addition to our family, Tess Elizabeth. She is 8 months old, and we can't imagine life without her now. Where does the time go?

The arrival of my birthday also means we're in my favorite season. It's getting darker earlier, and the air is taking on that cool, crisp quality that can only mean one thing... it's autumn! Time for pumpkin carving, hot apple cider, and Halloween. I'm going to be a witch this year, and so is Tess. We found the cutest little costume for her. I was excited to find a "scary" costume for a baby. Most of them are cutesy animals. Who wants to be a cow or a lion for Halloween? Not my baby!

Happy October!

When the Levee Breaks

Like everyone else following the news about the devastating after-effects of Hurricane Katrina, I am very depressed about the situation. I have tried to imagine just how bad it is for the people living through it, especially in New Orleans; their houses full of toxic water, no drinking water or food, no power, and no sewage system. Not to mention the dead bodies that have yet to be collected.

This was the hurricane that New Orleans had been dreading. The local and national government officials knew that the levees could not handle that much water. Now, instead of spending the 60 million required to improve the levee system in New Orleans (which is a drop in the bucket compared to what they have spent on the war in Iraq), we have a multi-billion dollar disaster on our hands that is effecting everyone in the country. Thank you, government, for screwing up AGAIN.

I have visited New Orleans 5 times, and I have a site devoted to it. It was such a cool city. It will never be the same again and neither will the people who lived there.

The Hummingbirds and The Bees

I don't know how "the birds and the bees" became the synonym for the sex talk that most parents have with their kids at some point. Given the subject it's referring to, you'd think that birds and bees would actually get along, but they don't.

My mom gave me a hummingbird feeder, and I followed her instructions of mixing 1 part sugar with 4 parts water in a pan and bringing it to a boil on the stove. Well, not only am I feeding hummingbirds, but there seems to be a large bee population gathered at the feeder. When a hummingbird flies up to get a drink of sugar water, the bees actually chase it away! I've witnessed hummingbirds and bees fighting at the feeder. So much for birds and bees living in harmony.

Give me a Big Mac or give me death

I am tired of fast food restaurants making lame efforts to appeal to so-called “health-minded” individuals. When I walk into a McDonald’s, I expect to eat fried, fatty food. That’s why I go there! If I wanted something healthy, I would go somewhere else or I’d just stay home and cook.

The lawsuit I heard about several months ago really baffled me. Someone was suing McDonald’s for making them obese. Everyone knows that fast food is bad for you (see the documentary “Super Size Me” if you are unsure), so you can’t blame McDonald’s for making you fat. There is always a choice. No one is forcing you to stuff that Triple Quarter Pounder with cheese and Super Sized fries down your throat. Thankfully, that lawsuit was thrown out. If the obese person had won, it would have caused a barrage of frivolous lawsuits. I can just see it now…

Joe Blow vs. Dairy Queen: Seeking $500,000 in damages caused by repeated ice cream headaches.

Jane Smith vs. Krispy Kreme: Claims the three doughnuts she was allowed to purchase thwarted her Weight Watchers plan.

I’m sure you get the idea. It’s kind of like a person with lung cancer suing a tobacco company. The bottom line is, this is America. We have lots of choices. It is up to you to make the right ones. Otherwise, shut up and suffer the consequences.

Music Milling

I attended another concert last night: Glen Phillips. He is/was the singer for Toad the Wet Sprocket. It was an excellent show in a small venue called the Music Mill. Just Glen and his guitar, and he was great.

I like the Music Mill because it is non-smoking. I feel so old because things like that matter to me. I hate to come home stinking like an ashtray.

I waited around afterwards, but Glen did not come out to sign autographs. My friend Brandi and I saw Toad years ago, and we didn't wait to meet them. I've always wished we had stayed. We saw them at Bogarts in Cincinnati, and it was pretty easy to meet bands there. We met Live, Teenage Fanclub, Cheap Trick, and a few no-name acts at Bogarts. Maybe I will meet Glen next time, if he ever comes back around.

Cellular Glow

Last night I went to see Duran Duran in concert. At most of the concerts I've attended (which is something like 80 or 90 concerts that I have ticket stubs for), people hold up lighters to create a sea of miniature, flickering flames stretching out in front of the band. Last night I noticed that instead of lighters, people were holding up their cell phones in hopes of catching a decent photo of the band (or rather, of Simon LeBon or John Taylor). It was a sea of cell phone screens from my balcony view. It just reminded me of how gadget crazy we have become.

On another note, the concert was good. They did every Duran Duran classic I can think of, except "Union of the Snake", which happens to be one of their greatest songs. Oh well. I was excited to hear "Ordinary World" and another song that I had completely forgotten about, "Come Undone". Simon was very energetic. He and John had the girls screaming throughout the show. During the show, I found myself wondering which of them was wearing a toupee or had used a hair regrowth product. I mean, what are the chances that out of five men, none of them are going bald?

Baby News

Last night Tess slept through the night, but I did not give her any rice cereal. I guess the rice cereal really wasn't helping her sleep through the night after all. I think I will wait until she is six months old before starting back up on the cereal. I gave her a tiny taste of smashed banana last night and she seemed to like it. Her first reaction to anything going in her mouth is to stick her tongue out (the tongue-thrust reflex), so I don't think she's ready for solids just yet.

My Love/Hate Relationship With eBay

I have a somewhat expensive hobby of collecting Barbies. I believe I have somewhere between 75 and 100 Barbies still in their boxes. They take up space that we really don't have (our 80's house has very small closets and no basement, so they sit in boxes and tubs in our spare bedroom), but that doesn't stop me from buying them.

When Mattel discontinued the old line of "Dolls of the World" and replaced it with the "Princess Dolls of the World" line, I didn't think I would buy them. I knew there would be an endless stream of these dolls, given the number of countries in the world. Well, by the time the third doll came out, Princess of the Incas -- did the Incas really have royalty? Anyway... I bought it. Since then, I have purchased every single princess Barbie. I missed the first two though, and I've been patiently waiting for the prices to come down on eBay. Each princess doll is $20 in the store, but the first two are currently selling from $50 and up on eBay. That's a little better than the original eBay going price, which was over $100.

I love eBay because I can find Barbies that I probably wouldn't normally be able to get, such as Peaches 'N Cream Barbie. She is from the early 80's. Mine was stolen by my babysitter the day after Christmas, and I never got it back, so I bought one on eBay. It helped to relieve the bitterness I had about that situation...

The thing I hate about eBay is that it floods the market with items that are supposed to be rare. Great for the buyer, bad for the seller. I have tried to sell a few Barbies on eBay, but all of my auctions failed. I refuse to sell an item for less than what I paid. I was shocked that the first two princess Barbies were going for so much. They will come down eventually. Then it will be another 20 years or more until they will be worth anything. Thanks to eBay, Barbies must obtain vintage status before you can get anything for them. That is, unless you can find that one rare opportunity where everyone missed out on the first item in a series and sell it.

Five Months Have Flown By

Tess is now five months old. I can't believe how fast the time goes. She has changed so much since being a sleepy newborn. She is extremely alert, focusing on objects and studying them... she's a miniature scientist. She recently discovered her feet, and she thinks it is great fun to hold onto them. She grabs a foot in each hand and giggles. Another of her favorite pastimes is blowing raspberries. I didn't know babies made so many cute noises until Tess came along. She still doesn't exhibit much interest in rolling over, but she does roll onto her side to look in her baby mirror or to grab a toy.

About two weeks ago, Tess started sleeping through the night (of course, mommy still woke up for the first few nights). We started her on a little rice cereal before bed. She still wakes up occasionally, so daddy will get her out of the crib and bring her to me. When that happens, she usually ends up staying with us until morning, but she spends most nights in her crib. Hurrah for rice cereal!

Feeling Porky

One interesting attribute left over from my pregnancy is that I cannot eat enough pork products. Before I was pregnant, I rarely ate pork. I had the occasional sausage or ham at holidays, and that was about it. During the first and second trimesters of the pregnancy, I found all kinds of meat repulsive. I ate a lot of beans during that time... then the third trimester hit. I had to have sausage, pork BBQ, ham, or anything else made from the heavenly hog. Tess is almost 4 months old, and it has not stopped! I used to eat a lot of chicken, but that doesn't sound good to me very often anymore. I'll take a pork BBQ sandwich and a sausage link on the side, please! We have fired up the grill a few times already this year, and we made butterflied pork chops in a Hawaiian marinade. Yum!

Hopefully this new pork addiction will not cause me to "pork out" anymore than the pregnancy already has...

Big Baby

I took Tess for her 2 month checkup on Friday, even though she was actually 2 1/2 months old. She weighed 15 pounds 5 ounces, and she's in the 99th percentile for weight! She was 24.25 inches long and in the 92nd percentile for height. What a big girl!